In the last few months,I have lost myself somewhere..Well,yeah..!I was A person who was a total freak,a crazy person in short who just loves her self..! You can say that im rather selfish about things that are mine.. but now i see that everything is changed..! Im no longer the same person who loves herself..! Now i somehow hate myself..!
May be yeah..,the only reason behind it is that im studying subjects im least interested in..No doubt i like chem,i just love it and im sure i can manage with math and phy as well,but this isn't what im really for.I like colors,love to escape this place into my own world of fantasy and imaginations.Thought mum would understand me but may be i was wrong..!I thought she would realize this isn't my world yet she dint.She wants to see her daughter as an other engineer..! May be this is all how it has to end..Who cares about what i wanna do..?"Mom,i don't wanna become an engineer,let me do what i want.!"..Im sure mum will never read this so it doesn't even matter..According to my parents,the only course that will earn you some respect is engineering for the reason that one has to sit and solve stuff rather than wander your minds into the space and expand your imaginations..!
I may sound very selfish,yet i want it the way i dreamt of.im sure i don't wanna regret looking back at my past.I want things to be the way i wished for i want it to be worth looking back at..I want to create my own existence in this big world,so that tomorrow if some thing really goes wrong i will never blame any one..yet nothings gonna really change..!Knowingly or unknowingly i have hurt my mum a lot..!She has been a great support to me..And i don't wanna hurt her any more..I will do this.,do this damn thing just for her..
:)
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